Mark Meltzer Writings: Days 145-150

Journal, "Stop Over in Tangiers"
STOPOVER IN TANGIERS

The Nellie Bly limped into port w/Capt. Ferrence nowhere to be found. The 2nd mate began arranging repairs. Got him to promise that the ship would not leave port w/o me.

Petit taxi into the city. Wound my way through the maze of the Medina, dodging eager guides & vendors. Locals pointed me to Seward, well known in the quarter as a man of regular habits. His "grey" reputation suits him... His clothes drained of color, his sallow, leathery face impassive as he sipped mint tea and suckled on shebakia.

Wanted nothing to do with me -until a few well-dropped hints convinced him I knew about the "Pawns" and their secret handshakes. (And,yes! there are secret handshakes.) Suspicious of listeners, he took me to his rooms. Spare, furnished mainly in books. We talked for hours -him sounding me out, me prying info in dribs & drabs.

Wondered how a man like this & a man like Lutwidge could find common ground. "Most minds are dull as dishwater," sneered Seward. "Lutwidge was, at least, never boring."

Seward claims he had been poking into 1946-47 vanishing cases as they related to the disappearance of his half-sister & best friend.(A touchy subject: Seward is not the cold cynic he likes to play. When I mentioned my daughter's disappearance he was earnest & concerned.) Lutwidge contacted him -and for a time, Seward was a major "Player" in the organization -Coordinating research efforts into the Vanishing. Over time, Lutwidge's obsession & paranoia mounted and Seward dis- tanced himself.

The last straw were the plots O.O.Lutwidge developed with "Red Pawn" --laying trails of false evidence to confuse Celeste Roget & others. Seward cut himself off from most of the organization ~1958 (before OOL's disappearance). Rec'd, but ignored contacts in 1960 after OOL was presumed dead.

A productive afternoon. Seward agreed to provide contact & introductions to European "Pawns."

Journal, "Meeting the Yellow Pawn (Cadiz)"
MEETING THE YELLOW PAWN (CADIZ)

Tension among the crew continues to make the most routine activities high drama. Explosive feud between Captain & 1st Mate as we approach port of Cadiz(Spain) this A.M. Captain furious he wasn't woken earlier and fretting about inspection of cargo.

While crew unloaded stores of coffee beans obtained in D.R.,I explore the dock. A young flower girl approached with an armful of yellow car- nations. I waved her off, but she insistently handed me one with a tag - 'Castillo de Santa Catalina, ' it read. I found my way to the battered old fortress near the end of Caleta Beach. And I saw her - the 'Yellow Pawn' on the walkway -bright as the sun in a yellow dress that fit her like wrapping paper. Squat, almost perfectly round, she had an infec- tious smile.

"You are a friend of the Grey Pawn," she said in that lilting accent. Then she handed me a folder - A good-will gesture. Accumulated files on the vanishing, including several individuals I had not previously noted.

My reputation preceded me. "For all these years, we thought the trail was cold," She said. The Grey Pawn had told her I might finally be able to crack the puzzles Lutwidge left behind. But to do that, I explained, I would need to find the Red Pawn. She scowled at that -no answer. I made myself even less popular when I asked for leads on Celeste Roget.

She said, "You act on your own, Senor Meltzer, we must not forget that. Your agenda is not our own. "She hinted that she would have to consult with the other "pawns".

"We know about your daughter," she said. "We wish you all the luck in finding her."

Then she turned her back to me. I had been dismissed.

(Writings below this line will be added to a new folder when it opens up.)

Journal, "French Revolutions (At Le Havre)"
FRENCH REVOLUTIONS (AT LE HAVRE)

As we docked in Le Havre (north side of the Seine, where it empties into the channel) - simmering tensions finally blew up. I walked on deck in the middle of a screaming match - Capt. Ferrence vs. the 1st Mate. The Mate told the Capt. that "we should dump it," he didn't "want any part of it," etc. Ferrence snarled that the Mate was a yellow-bellied coward. Fists flew - until the 2nd Mate got in the middle catching bruises from both sides.

Ferrence issued an ultimatum to the 1st Mate -- be gone from the boat by dark. 1st Mate tossed back that he'd rather go to prison or Nam than spend another minute under the Capt. An ugly mood - dark whispers. Everybody picking sides.

2nd and I went in town for drinks, hoping things would cool off. 2nd Mate (Dorgan) revealed that the Capt.'s wild mood swings had led to a dishonorable discharge from the Navy. The Capt hated the U.S. gov't - hence, his boat harbored fugitives & draft dodgers. Made for a volatile mix - esp. given the Capt.'s propensity for reckless acts.

Long after midnight, we staggered back - to find the boat strangely quiet. Over half the crew had walked. The 2nd Mate sighed wearily - a long week ahead.

Back in my cabin - got to wondering what was so special about those plaster Buddhas in the cargo hold. So I strategically dropped the one I'd 'borrowed'.... Now I know.

Wish my fate wasn't tied to Capt. Ferrence.

Note on Captain Ferrence Recording
0430 HRS - approx

Awoke to overhear Capt in heated debate with 2nd Mate. Getting more concerned about Capt's politics - motives - general stability. Doubt we will leave port anytime soon!

Journal, "The Maddening Wait (Le Havre)"
THE MADDENING WAIT (LE HAVRE)

A bad situation on the boat -I don't know if Ferrence is worse trouble when he's manic or depressive. Hasn't even moved today...while the second mate has done nothing about re-crewing, more interested in staying drunk. The S.S. Nellie Bly is not shipping out anytime soon... And I don't have the money to buy alt. passage to the N. Atlantic.

Forward motion - puzzles to solve - they keep me going. But tonight, I'm hearing from NOBODY I've tried to contact.

I lust lie on the bunk -eye drifting back to the photo.Thinking of better days. Of Cindy.

I hear her laughter echo 'round the bunk. "Daddy! Let's Go! What are you waiting for!" Another game of hide and seek. But as i jolt awake - Red-eyed, searching - I know I won't find her on this rusted sea-trap. I won't find anything but memories.